Hope Shattered Despair
by Daughter of Ashes
Summary: Cell is gone but now will Gohan's despair shatter his hopes, or will his hopes shatter his despair. I wrote this story for all you Gohan fans.


Disclaimers: I own no part of Dragonball/Z/GT. I also have no claims to the Lion King, all of those rights belong to Disney.

Author's note: This is a songfic. The song is "Endless Night" from the Lion King the Musical. That's the stage play not the movie. Go ahead and watch the movie forward, backward, even sideways if you can figure out how to do it, you'll still never find the song. It's a song that Simba sings as an adult. It is about how much he misses his father and how lost he feels without his guidance. It's a beautiful song I recommend you go listen to it if you have any access to it. 

Hope Shattered Despair 

Where had the starlight gone
dark is the day 
How can I find my way home
The memories burned their way to the surface once again. That face of pure evil. He had wanted to destroy everything and everyone. "Cell" the word was like acid in the young boy's mouth. He sat on the cold ground now as he remembered that horrible day. In the end he had bested the monster in the fight, but he felt that he had failed. He had failed the man who had meant so much to him, his father.
Home is an empty dream
Lost to the night

Father, I feel so alone

His father had sacrificed himself to save them all. And it was because of him that he had to do it. He had become a monster himself that day. He finally achieved that power that his father had been so sure of for so long. He was proud of himself and acted as such. He did not defeat Cell quickly as his father had told him to do. Instead he decided to make Cell suffer. He wanted Cell to suffer for all the pain he had caused. Even though he was warned that Cell could still be dangerous he was too proud of his new power. 
    
Now his father was gone because of that foolish act. 
    
"Dad why did you do it. It was my fault it should have been me. It's my fault."

You promised you'd be there

Whenever I needed you

Whenever I call your name

You're not anywhere

His father had appeared before him. He looked back at him with an expression of love and pride. It was a look that he felt he had not deserved. He had not understood what he was going to do at first. He heard him ask that he take care of his mother and tell her that he was sorry. He paused. When he spoke again Gohan understood.

"Goodbye Gohan." 

"**DAD!!!!**" He was gone.

I'm trying to hold on

Just waiting to hear your voice

One word, just a word will do

To end this nightmare

Why did it have to happen? He just wanted to live his life peacefully. To study and become a success for his mother. To become strong and make his father proud. Why did cruel beings like Cell have to exist? Why did his father have to die? 

"Why did you have to believe in me so much Dad."

When will the dawning break

Oh endless night

Sleepless I dream of the day

He only desired for the pain to end. He could not shake his guilt. It consumed all of him. 

When you were by my side

Guiding my path

Father, I can't find the way

Memories of happier times came to the surface now. He remembered back to his days as a crybaby, how he used to be so afraid and would always cling to his mother or father for protection. The three years that he spent training with his father and Piccolo. He was so happy to have his father back. He remembered how frightened he had been when his father collapsed from that heart attack, how happy he was when he recovered. Then room of Spirit and Time where his father taught him to become a Super Saiyan. "No". The memories only made it more painful and the tears began to flow.

You promised you'd be there 

Whenever I needed you

Whenever I call you name

You're not anywhere

"I'm sorry Dad. I'm so sorry. I miss you so much already."

I'm trying to hold on

Just waiting to hear your voice

One word, just a word will do 

To end this nightmare

"You probably don't want me to blame myself but I can't stop."

I know that the night must end

And that the sun will rise

And that the sun will rise

"Gohan."

"What, mom what are you doing up so late?"

"I couldn't sleep. Why are you sitting outside in the middle of the night."

"Thinking."

She knelt down next to him and drew him into a gentle hug. "I miss him too Gohan. But you have to stop blaming yourself."

Gohan looked up into her now glistening eyes.

I know that the clouds must clear

And that the sun will shine

And that the sun will shine

He returned her hug. He felt selfish now. He had been so caught up in his own self-pity that he had not paid enough attention to her. She must feel as much loss as he did. 

I know that the night must end

And that the sun will rise

And that the sun will rise

Something brushed Gohan's senses. It was a power of some kind, one he had never felt before. It was not hostile, in fact it was innocent and pure. 

I know that the clouds must clear

And that the sun will shine

And that the sun will shine

It felt so close but there was no one around. What could it possibly be?

I know

Yes, I know

The sun will rise

"Gohan why are you looking around like that? Is something wrong?"

"No mom." When he turned his eyes to her he realized that the power was coming from her.

Yes, I know

I know

The clouds must clear

I know that the night must end

A power in her that was separate from her own. That could only mean one thing. Soon he would have a little brother or sister. 

I know that the sun will rise

And I'll hear your voice deep inside

The joy that he felt shattered all his pain. He had a reason to live again, to be happy again. He said nothing to his mother as he hugged her again. 
I know that the night must end

And that the clouds must clear

The sun, the sun will rise

"Rest in peace father. I'll take care of them for you. Thank you" Gohan whispered.

The sun, the sun will rise


End file.
